Thursday, May 2, 2019

Why is Abuse so taboo in Christian society?

Let me begin this blog post by saying that I love being a Christian and love my relationship with my heavenly Father and the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross for me. Just so that we can set the record straight that by looking at the title above anyone doesn't misunderstand my love for my heavenly Father. Sometimes we can be most of our lives in the church, in Sunday school, reading our bible and interpret the word of God totally and completely wrong. As I began my walk with my ex-husband many years ago, I found out that I always wanted to submit to him and to the word of God and wanted very much to make the word of God work in our marriage. Instead of vice-versa making the word of God work in me so that it would be an example and it would flow into my marriage. As I prayed, I began to see a pattern in my husband that began with emotional tendencies of emotional abuse and verbal abuse that manifested into physical violence. Since I have always been a people pleaser, I wanted nothing more than to please him and make my Heavenly Father in heaven happy. I never wanted a divorce, but as things got worst, I found myself fighting through bruises and pain to stay with him, and I brought my son into such deep and painful agony. Indeed these are things that I have felt such condemnation over, but I had to learn to release and finally learned to forgive myself and my abusers. Yes, you read those right abusers! See I fell into the same pattern most women fall into with both my 1st son and then my second son. Any them now redeemed and learn through wisdom and knowledge of behaviours and tendencies. I  am FREE, in a beautiful marriage now full of promise and love. But I learned the patterns of abuse and what never to get into again. I realised that I am worthy,  that a relationship is not about 50/50 but 100/100 each putting in their equal amount to love and to be loved, that each much talk and communicate and no partner must make the other feel like the other is less.  That we are like-minded and sympathetic1 Peter 3: 8, not paying back evil for evil or insulting one another - 1 Peter 3:9, for such, is the blessing of God. And that if we do good to our partners and love them, we would speak and do good to them especially if we want good days - 1 Peter 3:10. And we must talk peacefully and walk peacefully and pursue it- 1 Peter 3:11. Because the eyes of God are on the righteous and on those who do what is right and good in his sight - 1 Peter 3:12. See I always kept look at 1 Peter 3:1 that I should submit to my husband but never read on. I always thought, "WELL THOSE ARE MY CONDITIONS I BETTER DO THEM!!" but real men have so much more to they are to abide by. 1 Peter 3:7 


1 Peter 3:7 In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.

The word Honor means-high respect; high esteem. Adherence to what is right or to a conventional standard of conduct. regard with great respect.fulfill (an obligation) or keep (an agreement).<
The word Understanding (greek gnĊsis) means- sympathetic awareness or tolerance, sympathetically aware of other people's feelings; tolerant and forgiving. Strongs - knowledge signifies in general intelligence, understanding
  1. the general knowledge of Christian religion
  2. the deeper more perfect and enlarged knowledge of this religion, such as belongs to the more advanced
  3. esp. of things lawful and unlawful for Christians
  4. moral wisdom, such as is seen in right living
The word NEW LIFE-  Gen 2:7
Then the LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground. He breathed the breath of life into the man's nostrils, and the man became a living person.

I would never want anyone's prayers to be hindered let alone my own, but I honestly felt a sense of dread to know I might be off with the Father. I wanted us blessed and our life blessed but the moment that he laid his hands on my body he broke that initial covenant with God. says, "The Hebrew word for "oath" is "shevah," meaning "to seven oneself" (In Gen 21:27 31, Abraham makes a treaty with Abimelech using seven ewe lambs, and they called the place "Beersheva," which means, "the place of the oath" or "the well of the sevens.")
If you don't have an oath, you don't have a covenant.
Another Hebrew word for oath is "I raise my hand" (See Deut 32:40ff). When we raise our hands in worship, for example, we are swearing an oath. We lift up God's name when we invoke God's name in an oath."

So we are invoking and swearing our marriage and giving it life but once we harm each other we break that oath, we break that covenant; especially when we do bodily, mental, emotional or spiritual harm. That is not to say God cannot fix what is not broken that is not true HE CAN DO MIRACLES...HE IS THE GOD OF MIRACLES. But, please do not stay through the bruises and pain; sometimes the door is opening to let you go through so that God can fix the issues with your significant other and make things better with you and your family. Trust me I would never want families broken, but God wants you better, your significant other better, your children happy and He wants to be satisfied with the outcome. Let him do the work, and he will work it out.  But for now, if you are going through something and you need help, please call a pastor, a leader or the Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)